Not-a-duck
Oct. 19th, 2006 06:41 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
I had a dream last night that the home office decided to shut down our branch. I agreed to stay on until the place was cleaned out on the understanding that I would receive a $5000 bonus in addition to my regular salary. I planned to buy a new(er) car with the bonus and start my new life.
I've been cranky for a while. It's not been a great year. The absence of bad does not automatically make good. But I also think I've gotten lazy. The easiest way to explain it is like this:
Say I'm the ugly duckling. It's not my fault I'm not-a-duck. There may have been lots of bad things about my barnyard of origin. I may have decided to leave the barnyard in search of my own kind thinking anything is better than cruelty from animals who by virtue of being a different genus or species don't understand I have different means or modes.
But winter's coming on, and if I keep sulking in the pond, I'm going to get my little, fluffy, ass frozen in that pond. The key is to keep moving, because while I can't help being not-a-duck, I can absolutely keep myself from getting frozen in that pond, and do whatever I can to survive the winter.
I'm having problems distinguishing between what's my responsibility and what isn't. And I'm getting blown around like a piece of dandelion fluff by circumstance. I'm made of sterner stuff. I need to stop picking up other people's business, and start dealing more directly with my daily needs. The rest will have to follow.
Today's schedule:
9-11 Intern
11-12 Mktg. Mtg.
12-2 June's goodbye banquet
I've been cranky for a while. It's not been a great year. The absence of bad does not automatically make good. But I also think I've gotten lazy. The easiest way to explain it is like this:
Say I'm the ugly duckling. It's not my fault I'm not-a-duck. There may have been lots of bad things about my barnyard of origin. I may have decided to leave the barnyard in search of my own kind thinking anything is better than cruelty from animals who by virtue of being a different genus or species don't understand I have different means or modes.
But winter's coming on, and if I keep sulking in the pond, I'm going to get my little, fluffy, ass frozen in that pond. The key is to keep moving, because while I can't help being not-a-duck, I can absolutely keep myself from getting frozen in that pond, and do whatever I can to survive the winter.
I'm having problems distinguishing between what's my responsibility and what isn't. And I'm getting blown around like a piece of dandelion fluff by circumstance. I'm made of sterner stuff. I need to stop picking up other people's business, and start dealing more directly with my daily needs. The rest will have to follow.
Today's schedule:
9-11 Intern
11-12 Mktg. Mtg.
12-2 June's goodbye banquet